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Betfair Great Posts
_ Betting shop characters (Part Six)
Huggy 14 Dec 15:54
No need for the ITRT,all been made reduntant.
Still get a nice pay off.
custardcream64
14 Dec 16:14
Top work camp , well done .
custardcream64
14 Dec 17:06
A few people on this thread have said that this lot could be
turned into a book
and i agree , it would make a great stocking
filler and i'm sure there would be a
market for it . Camp ,over to you !
custardcream64
14 Dec 19:37
I've spent the last couple of hours reading this thread again
and just like the first time
i have tears of laughter running down my face .
It's hard to pick a favourite out but the
one that gets me is the poor guy whose mother
had passed away that morning and when asked by
the manager how old she was replies , 'don't
know , but she was older than me '!
He then says ,'it's such a shock isn't it'?
'What your mother dying '?
'No , i've just had a dog called first in a
photo and it's got beat '!
Priceless . Thanks again for getting this
classic thread back up .
AM I TOO EARLY
14 Dec 19:39
Uncanny CC, not been on here for a while, but just brought a
nomination for Fred77 back to the top at the same time as you posted
on this.
custardcream64
14 Dec 19:49
CAMP- Just seen that as well , spooky !
I,ve also notice that in the soccer forum i
have put up by someone for the award of ' oddest formite' !
I'm quite proud !
AM I TOO EARLY
14 Dec 20:03
lol
jbarnes (no not him)
14 Dec 22:24
as good as before superb
Costa Rica Rica
14 Dec 23:42
I used to Run a shop in Leamington Spa on my day off the
relief manager was there and managed to get in to a fist fight in
the shop with a punter.....eventually it stopped and both went back
to there business when the punter came back up to the counter again
he placed his wager and followed up with "do you want a bit
more" to which the relief manager got out of his chair and
started again with him this time going from the office to the
street.........Thank god it was my day i wouldnt of fancied a ruck
with that guy.
rogerthebutler
15 Dec 14:20
Seriously, this thread should not go to waste.
How would everyone feel about approaching
Betfair to see if they would consider editing and publishing
selected highlights. failing that, Raceform or some other
Racing-related publishing house may go for it?
Proceeds, after expenses, could go to the
Injured Jockeys Fund?
I don't know enough about copywrite but if
everyone gave ther consent to have their 'work' published foi nix
then it might be a runner.
What does everyone think?
AM I TOO EARLY
15 Dec 14:26
Sounds good to me Roger.
DONEMYLOT
15 Dec 16:35
being flagged up on greyhound forum. hello lads, welcome to
chit chat. its hell on earth!
TheBigDogg
15 Dec 16:42
Best thread in the history of Betfair, needs to be
memorialized in a book.
shrewdie steve
15 Dec 17:26
When i was working in lewisham i used to go in the big L A
ddies near the station. There was a guy who used to come in every
now and then called cuthbert. Anyway, this guy had a serious drug
problem and we used to have a real laugh watching Cuthbert trying to
ponce pounds off of punters so that he could have a couple of quid
on a 2/1 fav. When they lost he used to look like he was gonna rob
the shop. He used to threaten the shop staff with violence, it
really was very funny, you had to be there. Every now and then i try
to pop in and watch 'Cuthbert the Crackhead' throw a strop!!!!
thebandit
15 Dec 18:42
THE NH FLAT RACE MAN
Seen this in a B.etfred shop in Taunton several
times. The last race of the Saturday afternoon cards before closing
(obviously barring any twilight/floddlight flat racing here) and
quite literally stands there and demands, nay throws a wobbly, why
the prices aren't up at least 15-25 before hand and paces quickly up
and down quickly with steam coming out of ears until they come up.
sammaguire
15 Dec 21:25
Worked in l a ddies in Nottingham in the mid to late 80's as
a manager when I was just turned 20. Crazy place but it has made
every other job since look like a doddle.
They put me in a particular shop because I was
Irish and most of the local drunks were the same and they thought I
could get on with them better. First day a guy to a swing at me cos
he thought I was taking the **** mocking his accent.
I was threatened, attacked by a disgruntled 80
year old waving a revolver and generally living on my wits every
day. Bloody great times all the same. Once caught the cleaner
shagging a punter in the shop when I returned unexpectedly after
closing up. She never came back.
AM I TOO EARLY
16 Dec 00:23
Have you changed your name?
sammaguire
16 Dec 15:58
Who me?
AM I TOO EARLY
16 Dec 17:26
Weren't you the one with the name spelt backwards.. :)
sammaguire
16 Dec 18:25
No, but there is a forumite with that name alright. Sam
Maguire is a famous character in the history of Gaelic Games.
Tommy Toes
17 Dec 14:17
Saving.
AM I TOO EARLY
17 Dec 15:37
Okay Sam , you're free to go.. :)
Thanks Tommy, I'll put some more on after
dinner.
lilo rumpo
17 Dec 17:00
agreed, best threads reading ever on betfair imo, we've all
seen these characters, diff gravy lol
Seasider.
17 Dec 23:30
up
custardcream64
17 Dec 23:56
Hello again . Has anyone read a book written by a lady who
worked as a cashier in a bookies ?
I'm talking about 10 yrs ago , it was about
60-70 pages and described various betting shop customers , the drunk
, once a year punter etc .It was quite amusing , particualary if you
have ever worked in a bookies .
AM I TOO EARLY
18 Dec 00:56
Not me C-C
AM I TOO EARLY
18 Dec 09:28
How do you like my new name, does it suit me?
custardcream64
18 Dec 19:07
TTT .
THE QUIZMASTER
19 Dec 10:56
ttt
TOTALLY PROFESSIONAL
19 Dec 20:34
lol
TheBigDogg
20 Dec 19:27
ttt
Tommy Toes
21 Dec 16:21
Saving.
curious-cat
21 Dec 19:48
shaving
Velasquez
21 Dec 22:24
Thread of the year - some great stories.
ukgatsby.
22 Dec 00:08
quality :)
regvarney
22 Dec 00:10
brilliant
Young Inca
31 Dec 20:11
up ye go
cannyman
31 Dec 20:13
still think mine's the best, Lucky Fred. :-)
Young Inca
31 Dec 20:17
Happy New Year Cannyman
sugarfoot
20 Mar 19:00
for rossobianchi
cannyman
20 Mar 19:32
Thanks Young Inca.
Same to you.
redbag 20 Mar 19:32
LOL@ CANNYMAN
cannyman
20 Mar 19:36
Better late than never. :-)
Young Inca
20 Mar 19:41
Cheers Cannyman :)
cannyman
20 Mar 19:44
You're welcome mate.
Sorry for the delay. Been at the pub.
custardcream64
20 Mar 19:55
Great to see the best ever thread back up on here , well done
.
TOTALLY PROFESSIONAL
20 Mar 19:55
Yeah! Happy New Year Everyone :)
step
20 Mar 21:10
Worked for Mecca in the 70's. A mate of mine got held up at
gunpoint. Told to lie on the floor, gunman then said " On your
front you cvnt"
Lies, DamnLies, and Statistics 23
Mar 08:18
just read some more.....very, very funny.....betting shops
the same the world over, i reckon.....strange assortment of
individuals....
theracegoer
24 Mar 00:00
Am reading backwards! and have got to page three at the
moment. There are some real gems here and it is a credit to all
involved. Do not let this thread dissapear.
Lies, DamnLies, and Statistics 25
Mar 03:33
keep it here, people....
Maria Kirilenko ate my hamster 26
Mar 01:03
Just for you, Rebus baby. :)
Steve Punt
26 Mar 01:07
Good work MKamh
redbag 26 Mar 12:44
funniest thing i have ever read on the forum---they ought to
make a tv show :D
cannyman
26 Mar 15:20
It's time we had some new stories.
frasier
26 Mar 15:21
i agree with cannyman.
cannyman
26 Mar 15:21
Thank you, I've already put up "Lucky Fred"
Lies, DamnLies, and Statistics 26
Mar 15:23
i've got some good ones of aussie betting shops....most
involve mentally deficient people who took exception at something i
did or said to them.....
cannyman
26 Mar 15:34
We're waiting. :-)
minjita 26 Mar 15:36
Oh dear, I'm going to be late going in for my vital kidney
transplant, but I can't miss this...
Lies, DamnLies, and Statistics 26
Mar 15:38
it's late here, so they won't be tonight....see my thread for
some details....
Lies, DamnLies, and Statistics 26
Mar 15:58
good night chitchatters....
DUNCAN WAZ MAGIC
26 Mar 21:25
smashing,w/d lads
TOTALLY PROFESSIONAL
27 Mar 00:17
lol
stewarty b
27 Mar 05:42
Lies, DamnLies, and Statistics 28
Mar 09:00
ok, my stories aren't as good as the originals...basically
all the ones related to betting shops would be cases of me taking on
crazy people, and then them threatening to kill me.....but in the
interests of keeping this FECKING HILARIOUS fred from extinction,
here goes with a couple of quick tales of people i have encountered
in my part time job as a bookie's clerk in magnificent melbourne
town....
THE CIGAR-CHOMPING MIDGET
i picked up a job working the computer on the
members' side of the rail a couple of spring carnivals ago, where i
encountered this memorable chap. he looked like a cross between the
millionaire from Monopoly, and hans moleman from The Simpsons....add
in the worst combover you've ever seen, and he was pretty much the
strangest looking person you would ever encounter......he was as
short as a person could be without actually being a midget, and
always dressed in top-hat and tails, with a cigar constantly on the
spin......that's pretty much the story.....interesting rather than
funny, but he obviously had a few quid to spare....i have absolutely
no idea where it might have come from.....
STRANGE AMOUNT PUNTER
another big punter from the members' enclosure,
what distinguished this fella was his strange betting amounts.....he
was always carrying around a book, constantly jotting something
down, so he was obviously thinking about it....then he'd come up and
ask for $385 on a horse......
after a few meetings, i worked out that he only
ever bet in 3 amounts....i can't remember what they actually were,
but they were something like 385, 770 and 1540.....doubled, and
doubled again.....he obviously had some staking system, but not one
of his 3 amounts was a round figure.....very strange....
THE LAP-DANCE KID
last spring carnival, i filled in at a couple
of meetings at royal flemington, carrying the bag amongst the
assorted riff-raff in 'general admission'....just a small,
interstate bookie, late in the day one of those 18 year olds that go
the spring carnival comes up, off his face, and has 20 bucks on a
horse at 4.2.....
he comes back a couple of minutes later, didn't
realise the race was still about 20 minutes away.....he'd just
realised his horse was 8 bucks on the t ote, and wanted to
cancel.....we wouldn't let him, so he p*ssed off for a bit......of
course, the horse wins, and he comes up as soon as they cross the
line to gloat.... a few minutes of abuse until weight comes thru,
then he tells us he's gonna spend his winnings on a lap dance.....he
had a couple of mates....all of them thought this was hilarious....
i'm sure i didn't word it as eloquently as
this, but when i gave him his money i said something like 'when you
get that lardance, imagine what she'd be doing if ya'd backed it on
the t ote'......think he was too p*ssed to get it, but i thought it
was hilarious.....
ok, there ya go.....not as good as the others,
i know, but interesting, at least???
i'm sure people here would have better
stories....let's see them, people.....
Lies, DamnLies, and Statistics 28
Mar 11:24
the animal
24 Jun 19:43
11 kv actually beat me to it, literally by seconds, but
thanks all the same.
harry31
24 Jun 23:59
THE ROCKING HORSE(SO NAMED FROM THE WAY HE USED TO ROCK
PRECARIOUSLY FROM SIDE TO SIDE WHILST STANDING)
used to roam the kilburn high road/cricklewood
broadway in the eighties - retarded/drink sodden giant son of some
loaded irish builder - frequented the the twenty or so betting shops
in the vicinty on a daily basis with trousers round around ankles
grunting unintelligble drivel at any terrified punters in the
vicinity whilst gnawing at giant meat bone given to him by local
butcher to get rid of him out of their shop - the glorious day came
when whilst managing the ladcrooks shop in the broadway one busy
saturday(when the shop shut at 6.30 and the hoards had been slung
out the floor was always full of hundreds of guinness cans) - the
district manager from hell arrived to give me the usual load of
sh1te - there was dust on the pelmets - the penny bags only had 99p
in them etc etc - horrible scots git called fred underwood - hope
he's frying in hell fire - in the middle of racing arrives the
rocking horse covered in blood plus bone - fred eventually notices
him and tells me to sling him out(not a policy that the RH
appreciated) - i refuse on the grounds on 'elf and safety - so fred
draws himself up to his full 5ft 6in puffs out his chest and with a
full shop of punters looking on with great interest,marches up to
the RH, pokes him up in the back and informs him his presence is no
longer acceptable - RH lurches round takes 1 look at the creep
before and with one silky movement delivers said giant bone with
ferocious force into freds face - result - one horrible jock sparko
on the deck with smashed glasses,multo claret and a totally
spontaneous sustained round of applause from the packed shop - exit
the rocking horse with with a crafty grin on his mush - A TRUE
BETTING SHOP HERO!
harry31
25 Jun 00:00
THE ROCKING HORSE(SO NAMED FROM THE WAY HE USED TO ROCK
PRECARIOUSLY FROM SIDE TO SIDE WHILST STANDING)
used to roam the kilburn high road/cricklewood
broadway in the eighties - retarded/drink sodden giant son of some
loaded irish builder - frequented the the twenty or so betting shops
in the vicinty on a daily basis with trousers round around ankles
grunting unintelligble drivel at any terrified punters in the
vicinity whilst gnawing at giant meat bone given to him by local
butcher to get rid of him out of their shop - the glorious day came
when whilst managing the ladcrooks shop in the broadway one busy
saturday(when the shop shut at 6.30 and the hoards had been slung
out the floor was always full of hundreds of guinness cans) - the
district manager from hell arrived to give me the usual load of
sh1te - there was dust on the pelmets - the penny bags only had 99p
in them etc etc - horrible scots git called fred underwood - hope
he's frying in hell fire - in the middle of racing arrives the
rocking horse covered in blood plus bone - fred eventually notices
him and tells me to sling him out(not a policy that the RH
appreciated) - i refuse on the grounds on 'elf and safety - so fred
draws himself up to his full 5ft 6in puffs out his chest and with a
full shop of punters looking on with great interest,marches up to
the RH, pokes him up in the back and informs him his presence is no
longer acceptable - RH lurches round takes 1 look at the creep
before and with one silky movement delivers said giant bone with
ferocious force into freds face - result - one horrible jock sparko
on the deck with smashed glasses,multo claret and a totally
spontaneous sustained round of applause from the packed shop - exit
the rocking horse with with a crafty grin on his mush - A TRUE
BETTING SHOP HERO!
harry31
25 Jun 00:01
THE ROCKING HORSE(SO NAMED FROM THE WAY HE USED TO ROCK
PRECARIOUSLY FROM SIDE TO SIDE WHILST STANDING)
used to roam the kilburn high road/cricklewood
broadway in the eighties - retarded/drink sodden giant son of some
loaded irish builder - frequented the the twenty or so betting shops
in the vicinty on a daily basis with trousers round around ankles
grunting unintelligble drivel at any terrified punters in the
vicinity whilst gnawing at giant meat bone given to him by local
butcher to get rid of him out of their shop - the glorious day came
when whilst managing the ladcrooks shop in the broadway one busy
saturday(when the shop shut at 6.30 and the hoards had been slung
out the floor was always full of hundreds of guinness cans) - the
district manager from hell arrived to give me the usual load of
sh1te - there was dust on the pelmets - the penny bags only had 99p
in them etc etc - horrible scots git called fred underwood - hope
he's frying in hell fire - in the middle of racing arrives the
rocking horse covered in blood plus bone - fred eventually notices
him and tells me to sling him out(not a policy that the RH
appreciated) - i refuse on the grounds on 'elf and safety - so fred
draws himself up to his full 5ft 6in puffs out his chest and with a
full shop of punters looking on with great interest,marches up to
the RH, pokes him up in the back and informs him his presence is no
longer acceptable - RH lurches round takes 1 look at the creep
before and with one silky movement delivers said giant bone with
ferocious force into freds face - result - one horrible jock sparko
on the deck with smashed glasses,multo claret and a totally
spontaneous sustained round of applause from the packed shop - exit
the rocking horse with with a crafty grin on his mush - A TRUE
BETTING SHOP HERO!
harry31
25 Jun 00:01
THE ROCKING HORSE(SO NAMED FROM THE WAY HE USED TO ROCK
PRECARIOUSLY FROM SIDE TO SIDE WHILST STANDING)
used to roam the kilburn high road/cricklewood
broadway in the eighties - retarded/drink sodden giant son of some
loaded irish builder - frequented the the twenty or so betting shops
in the vicinty on a daily basis with trousers round around ankles
grunting unintelligble drivel at any terrified punters in the
vicinity whilst gnawing at giant meat bone given to him by local
butcher to get rid of him out of their shop - the glorious day came
when whilst managing the ladcrooks shop in the broadway one busy
saturday(when the shop shut at 6.30 and the hoards had been slung
out the floor was always full of hundreds of guinness cans) - the
district manager from hell arrived to give me the usual load of
sh1te - there was dust on the pelmets - the penny bags only had 99p
in them etc etc - horrible scots git called fred underwood - hope
he's frying in hell fire - in the middle of racing arrives the
rocking horse covered in blood plus bone - fred eventually notices
him and tells me to sling him out(not a policy that the RH
appreciated) - i refuse on the grounds on 'elf and safety - so fred
draws himself up to his full 5ft 6in puffs out his chest and with a
full shop of punters looking on with great interest,marches up to
the RH, pokes him up in the back and informs him his presence is no
longer acceptable - RH lurches round takes 1 look at the creep
before and with one silky movement delivers said giant bone with
ferocious force into freds face - result - one horrible jock sparko
on the deck with smashed glasses,multo claret and a totally
spontaneous sustained round of applause from the packed shop - exit
the rocking horse with with a crafty grin on his mush - A TRUE
BETTING SHOP HERO!
harry31
25 Jun 00:02
THE ROCKING HORSE(SO NAMED FROM THE WAY HE USED TO ROCK
PRECARIOUSLY FROM SIDE TO SIDE WHILST STANDING)
used to roam the kilburn high road/cricklewood
broadway in the eighties - retarded/drink sodden giant son of some
loaded irish builder - frequented the the twenty or so betting shops
in the vicinty on a daily basis with trousers round around ankles
grunting unintelligble drivel at any terrified punters in the
vicinity whilst gnawing at giant meat bone given to him by local
butcher to get rid of him out of their shop - the glorious day came
when whilst managing the ladcrooks shop in the broadway one busy
saturday(when the shop shut at 6.30 and the hoards had been slung
out the floor was always full of hundreds of guinness cans) - the
district manager from hell arrived to give me the usual load of
sh1te - there was dust on the pelmets - the penny bags only had 99p
in them etc etc - horrible scots git called fred underwood - hope
he's frying in hell fire - in the middle of racing arrives the
rocking horse covered in blood plus bone - fred eventually notices
him and tells me to sling him out(not a policy that the RH
appreciated) - i refuse on the grounds on 'elf and safety - so fred
draws himself up to his full 5ft 6in puffs out his chest and with a
full shop of punters looking on with great interest,marches up to
the RH, pokes him up in the back and informs him his presence is no
longer acceptable - RH lurches round takes 1 look at the creep
before and with one silky movement delivers said giant bone with
ferocious force into freds face - result - one horrible jock sparko
on the deck with smashed glasses,multo claret and a totally
spontaneous sustained round of applause from the packed shop - exit
the rocking horse with with a crafty grin on his mush - A TRUE
BETTING SHOP HERO!
harry31
25 Jun 00:02
THE ROCKING HORSE(SO NAMED FROM THE WAY HE USED TO ROCK
PRECARIOUSLY FROM SIDE TO SIDE WHILST STANDING)
used to roam the kilburn high road/cricklewood
broadway in the eighties - retarded/drink sodden giant son of some
loaded irish builder - frequented the the twenty or so betting shops
in the vicinty on a daily basis with trousers round around ankles
grunting unintelligble drivel at any terrified punters in the
vicinity whilst gnawing at giant meat bone given to him by local
butcher to get rid of him out of their shop - the glorious day came
when whilst managing the ladcrooks shop in the broadway one busy
saturday(when the shop shut at 6.30 and the hoards had been slung
out the floor was always full of hundreds of guinness cans) - the
district manager from hell arrived to give me the usual load of
sh1te - there was dust on the pelmets - the penny bags only had 99p
in them etc etc - horrible scots gentleman - hope he's frying in
hell fire - in the middle of racing arrives the rocking horse
covered in blood plus bone - fred eventually notices him and tells
me to sling him out(not a policy that the RH appreciated) - i refuse
on the grounds on 'elf and safety - so fred draws himself up to his
full 5ft 6in puffs out his chest and with a full shop of punters
looking on with great interest,marches up to the RH, pokes him up in
the back and informs him his presence is no longer acceptable - RH
lurches round takes 1 look at the creep before and with one silky
movement delivers said giant bone with ferocious force into freds
face - result - one horrible jock sparko on the deck with smashed
glasses,multo claret and a totally spontaneous sustained round of
applause from the packed shop - exit the rocking horse with with a
crafty grin on his mush - A TRUE BETTING SHOP HERO!
harry31
25 Jun 00:03
THE ROCKING HORSE(SO NAMED FROM THE WAY HE USED TO ROCK
PRECARIOUSLY FROM SIDE TO SIDE WHILST STANDING)
used to roam the kilburn high road/cricklewood
broadway in the eighties - retarded/drink sodden giant son of some
loaded irish builder - frequented the the twenty or so betting shops
in the vicinty on a daily basis with trousers round around ankles
grunting unintelligble drivel at any terrified punters in the
vicinity whilst gnawing at giant meat bone given to him by local
butcher to get rid of him out of their shop - the glorious day came
when whilst managing the ladcrooks shop in the broadway one busy
saturday(when the shop shut at 6.30 and the hoards had been slung
out the floor was always full of hundreds of guinness cans) - the
district manager from hell arrived to give me the usual load of
sh1te - there was dust on the pelmets - the penny bags only had 99p
in them etc etc - horrible scots gentleman - hope he's frying in
hell fire - in the middle of racing arrives the rocking horse
covered in blood plus bone - fred eventually notices him and tells
me to sling him out(not a policy that the RH appreciated) - i refuse
on the grounds on 'elf and safety - so fred draws himself up to his
full 5ft 6in puffs out his chest and with a full shop of punters
looking on with great interest,marches up to the RH, pokes him up in
the back and informs him his presence is no longer acceptable - RH
lurches round takes 1 look at the creep before and with one silky
movement delivers said giant bone with ferocious force into freds
face - result - one horrible jock sparko on the deck with smashed
glasses,multo claret and a totally spontaneous sustained round of
applause from the packed shop - exit the rocking horse with with a
crafty grin on his mush
harry31
25 Jun 00:03
THE ROCKING HORSE
used to roam the kilburn high road/cricklewood
broadway in the eighties - retarded/drink sodden giant son of some
loaded irish builder - frequented the the twenty or so betting shops
in the vicinty on a daily basis with trousers round around ankles
grunting unintelligble drivel at any terrified punters in the
vicinity whilst gnawing at giant meat bone given to him by local
butcher to get rid of him out of their shop - the glorious day came
when whilst managing the ladcrooks shop in the broadway one busy
saturday(when the shop shut at 6.30 and the hoards had been slung
out the floor was always full of hundreds of guinness cans) - the
district manager from hell arrived to give me the usual load of
sh1te - there was dust on the pelmets - the penny bags only had 99p
in them etc etc - horrible scots gentleman - hope he's frying in
hell fire - in the middle of racing arrives the rocking horse
covered in blood plus bone - fred eventually notices him and tells
me to sling him out(not a policy that the RH appreciated) - i refuse
on the grounds on 'elf and safety - so fred draws himself up to his
full 5ft 6in puffs out his chest and with a full shop of punters
looking on with great interest,marches up to the RH, pokes him up in
the back and informs him his presence is no longer acceptable - RH
lurches round takes 1 look at the creep before and with one silky
movement delivers said giant bone with ferocious force into freds
face - result - one horrible jock sparko on the deck with smashed
glasses,multo claret and a totally spontaneous sustained round of
applause from the packed shop - exit the rocking horse with with a
crafty grin on his mush
harry31
25 Jun 17:52 BENNY
benny was the only cashier in the sadcrooks
shop in denman st (small shop just around the corner from piccadilly
circus) He was a horrible greasy little jewish gentleman in his late
fifties with the foulest mouth imaginable - he used to sit having a
**** with the toilet door wide open whilst swearing loudly at the
sporting life - he used to insist on receiving his weekly wages in
fivers and would count and recount them endlessly before tying them
up with an elastic band as tightly as possible - the impression
being that it would choke him to spend one of them - the punters,
who hated him(the feeling was mutual) would wait till he was on the
phone/ gone to the bog/ making a cuppa, then as soon as the bell for
the dog race would ring, half a dozen of them would charge up to the
counter waving betting slips, benny would drop the phone/drink on
the floor, trip over the chair in his haste to get to the counter to
take the bets , only to realise they were all taking the **** and
didn't want a bet - cue a tirade from benny "you effing black/irish/****
wnkers - thats the last bet i'm taking from you kunts -eff off to
mecca's etc etc - this happened several times a week - one day
whilst in there as a relief manager the phone rang and benny
answered- the conversation went as follows:
-ello
-you effing what?
-what are you on about you stupid effer?
-eff off you bald headed kunt - this is a
betting shop
phone gets slammed down
-who was that?
-effing stirling moss looking for some theatre
tickets
ROB.B.
22 Aug 01:16
I had to chuck a guy out this week who'd obviously filled his
pants in the shop, everyone was complaining aout the smell.... As he
was going through the door he asked me if he should have a bath or
just a wash???????????
Mandalay
18 Sep 02:13
This bloke by the name of Eugene would come into the bookies
at opening time every day and stay till closing time. He would back
in every single race but would have to walk outside the door as the
race was about to start and would peek through the window at the TV
screen to monitor how his selection was doing. He never gave an
explanation as to why he did this and some of the other clowns in
the bookies who knew his habit would stand at the window to block
his view as a joke. This quirk of his has gone on for the 30 years+
that he has been going in the bookies.
AM I TOO EARLY 29 Jul 00:12
'EAVY 'ANDED 'ARRY
Takes 5 or 6 slips out of the dispenser and
writes one bet out. All the other slips are knackered because he
presses so hard with the pen. Can't move a chair without hitting
somebodys shins with it. He pulled the chain from the khazi cistern
once, came out and put it on the counter and said 'That's broke.
Huggy 08 Oct 21:57
A legendary character in the LBO's of Leeds city centre,his
nickname says it all**never been known to back a selection odds
against,always on LARGE,if on a loser starts swearing at the staff.
To look at him you would think he has not got
two bob,allergic to soap and deodorant.I know him to talk to,and is
always telling me that the games "****",he seems always to
have emergency readies for when he's on a bad run.He has been
frequenting the offices of Leeds for twentyfive years and still
going strong.
** I've lost the nickname...:(
Baggers
10 Oct 15:36
BENNY
benny was the only cashier in the sadcrooks
shop in denman st (small shop just around the corner from piccadilly
circus) He was a horrible greasy little jewish gentleman in his late
fifties with the foulest mouth imaginable - he used to sit having a
**** with the toilet door wide open whilst swearing loudly at the
sporting life - he used to insist on receiving his weekly wages in
fivers and would count and recount them endlessly before tying them
up with an elastic band as tightly as possible - the impression
being that it would choke him to spend one of them - the punters,
who hated him(the feeling was mutual) would wait till he was on the
phone/ gone to the bog/ making a cuppa, then as soon as the bell for
the dog race would ring, half a dozen of them would charge up to the
counter waving betting slips, benny would drop the phone/drink on
the floor, trip over the chair in his haste to get to the counter to
take the bets , only to realise they were all taking the **** and
didn't want a bet - cue a tirade from benny "you effing black/irish/****
wnkers - thats the last bet i'm taking from you kunts -eff off to
mecca's etc etc - this happened several times a week - one day
whilst in there as a relief manager the phone rang and benny
answered- the conversation went as follows:
-ello
-you effing what?
-what are you on about you stupid effer?
-eff off you bald headed kunt - this is a
betting shop
phone gets slammed down
-who was that?
-effing stirling moss looking for some theatre
tickets
I had the great pleasure (or not) of working
with Benny for a few Saturdays when manager of the Goswell Rd
Sadblokes, he hated anybody winning as it affected his shares he
said :D
trademark
10 Oct 15:45
GUINNESS
Old asian bloke early 70's with whispy white
hair frequented North Harrow Billys in early noughties. Looked like
a pint of guiness hence the name, 10p e/w bets, in at opening, left
at closing, annoying from a cashiers point (me) but the manager
liked him for the slip count!!
Leathers
08 Nov 20:33Hearts.no1
08 Nov 20:39
best thread ever on here :)
harry31
08 Nov 22:35
sadcrooks - quenns park london - a phenomenom suddenly
appeared, as in,when coming to take down the papers at the end of
the night you would become aware of all these losing pink customer
copies of their bets pinned to the pinboard with written pithy
comments on them - e.g. £2 win titus oats -( 2/1 fav - fell at the
last when 10 lengths clear) - would have "double f*ck to holy
mary the filthy wh*re" scrawled over it - other equally
vitriolic classics would include-" b*llocks to god the dirty b*stard",
"hope the c*nts(horse and jockey presumably)die of aids"
etc etc- we had absolutely no idea who the psychopathic perpatrator
might be amongst a very busy shopfull of various cockney/west indian/chinese/irish
punters - suspision was cast upon all manner of unsuspecting
clientele - a "dead pool" style kitty was set up amongst
the the staff as to the idendity of the culprit - this went on for
several weeks until one day a purse was handed in containing 20 quid
and amongst other things a winning slip -£2 win ardross- in the
culpits hand writing - with tension at fever pitch next morning the
opening gambit of everyone approching the counter was awaited with
mounting tension - all day nothing -till approaching closing time -
in the door and up to the counter waddles bridget(grey haired,cheery,
ruddy checked old irish biddy,legion of mary badge as always
prominently dispayed on lapel, "isn't a lovely day to be
alive,thank god"etc) - claims the purse, cashes in her
docket,gets her 9 quid winnings and says "i'm off to church
lads - i'll put this in the collection plate" and strolls out -
"dead pool"was void.
King Kauto
08 Nov 22:41
i have been in more london bookies than i care to remember
and can't believe a wallet or purse would be returned in any of
them, good shop You had there
Huggy 08 Nov 23:03
I once found a wallet in a billys office in a Seacroft
(Leeds) with over two hundred pounds in it,i took it to the toilet
to count it,and guilt took over,and i handed in to the manager.
Looking back at it now i wish i had not,because
when i went back in a week later the manager told me someone had
claimed it.,i did not believe him.
harry31
09 Nov 11:44
BUSTYA HEAD
irish female cashier- sadcrooks on relief in
the kilburn area early 80s - was max 4ft10,7 stone, wore enourmous
doc martins - would lean back on her chair reading the sun with the
docs on the counter - took great delight in telling large irate west
indian punters with attitude problems to "f*ck off or i'll bust
ya head" while the rest of us cowered in the kitchen
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